I Carry Your Heart

One of the aspects of pregnancy which absorbed me more than anything else was the idea that for nine months I had two heartbeats. My own, and the fast gallop of Calvin's heart that I had the chance to eavesdrop on at every doctor's appointment. Thinking of this in bed last night, and then looking over to the heart that now beats outside of me, in his little swing, this e.e. cummings poem came to mind.

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

- e. e. cummings ~

I have a feeling that I will always carry Calvin's heart in me still.

Photo by Elliot Erwin.


Nancy said...

All teary-eyed here after reading this.

Love you all and miss you.

Nancy aka Grandma


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